Menstrual-controlled running shoes, new from Asics.

No, seriously. I only wish I were kidding. Just when you thought the shamelessness of running-shoe scams had reached bottom, whaddaya know — they find new depths to the cesspool. Asics is kindly offering to sell you a $190 running shoe that will magically adjust its midsole to your menstrual cycle. Read on, and marvel at how the Asics flack gets this stuff out with a straight face.

If you weren't grouchy already, this'll do it.